Coming Out as Bisexual: An Act of Self-Love


Coming out is an important moment for many in the queer community, but what if you never technically have to come out, or you’re not sure you even have anything to come out about? Growing up, Wilson knew she liked boys, but she was confused about the feelings that girls would sometimes provoke in her. She hated herself for being confused. As a supporter of queer rights, she felt that even discussing her confusion would take away from “real queer people,” and she saw her own identity as invalid. After all, she married a man and was incredibly happy with him, so what was the point of exploring her identity even further? But one day during Pride Month, Eleanor wondered why she didn’t think her identity mattered and why she had been unhappily hiding herself. She realized that to finally feel comfortable in her own skin, she had to be honest. After coming out via social media, Eleanor couldn’t stop telling everyone she talked to; it gave her such a rush of love for herself and her unique identity. If there’s one thing Eleanor’s story can teach us, it’s that accepting yourself and showing who you are to the world takes time, bravery, and a whole lot of self-love.

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Discussion Question:

Where do you lie on the spectrum of sexuality? Does your sexuality ever fluctuate?


Action Item:

The bisexual community is often talked negatively about by both straight and gay communities. Actively listen for those perpetuating stereotypes and using bi-phobic language—things like “it’s just a phase,” “bisexual people are promiscuous,” “she’s married to a guy so she’s not bi,” or “they just want attention.” If you hear these things, try to stand up for your brothers and sisters and validate their identity.


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